Charlie Sheen wants to become Lindsay Lohan's savior, and he thinks he has the credentials and cred to do the job.

Charlie tells TMZ, "I have a kinship with somebody [Lindsay] who clearly needs a mentor, whether she wants one or not. She can continue to hang out with her dress shredding club buddies, or turn to me for some advice from a guy who's been down the road as well as every other side trail on the journey."

He adds, "If she listens, she'll win. If she doesn't, that's on her."

You'll recall ... Charlie and Lindsay struck up a friendship while working together on "Scary Movie 5," after which Charlie cut Lindsay a $100,000 check to help with her tax problems. Lindsay's now returning the favor by appearing in an upcoming episode of "Anger Management" -- actually, that may be Charlie doing Lindsay another solid.

Shockingly, Charlie still claims they've never hooked up, "I love her, I respect her, and I've never laid a finger on her that wasn't on film. How ya like me now, America?"