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Still Won't Read Those Tracts
(Preview)
Independent | Submitted by: Bernie 'Cardinal' Law (Mary-Major's 'Major Mary'!) "An article published in July's edition of The Watchtower warns followers to stay clear of "false teachers" who are condemned as being "mentally diseased" apostates who should be avoid...
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Plane vs Ferris Wheel
(Preview)
Australian Broadcasting | Submitted by: JJ "A local pilot was flying with his son-in-law when he failed his first landing attempt on the airstrip next to the festival. When he turned the plane around, he crashed into the ferris wheel... Two small children had to be rescued from a basket at the to...
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Brown Beer Bottle Bonking
(Preview)
BBC | Submitted by: SexyPubes "Certain Australian beetles will try to copulate with discarded beer bottles, but they have to be of the right type: brown ones with bobbly bits on them... These beetles have enormous genitalia, and they're large to start with, over two inches long. "The sad...
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Pissswhoomph
(Preview)
The Local DE | Submitted by: SquissyPubes "The 43-year-old from Wiesbaden died on the way to hospital after the incident at Rüsselheim Opelwerke station where he and two friends had been waiting for a train home... When they got to the station he had run to the end of the platform and jumped down...
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Irishman Spontaneously Combusts
(Preview)
Guardian | Submitted by: Bella "Garda O'Callaghan said he went to the house after the fire had been extinguished and found Faherty lying on his back in a sitting room. The only damage was to Faherty's remains, the floor underneath him and the ceiling above. His body had been extensively burned...
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Chopping Up The Carrot Lady
(Preview)
Daily Mail | Submitted by: anonymouse "The court heard that Mrs Muhr was an attractive and joyful lady who loved to growing carrots before feeding them to donkeys she passed on frequent country walks. Detectives established that Bureau had intercepted her and dragged her into a barn at his fa...
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Bear Hunters Evened Out
(Preview)
Valley Morning Star | Submitted by: Rotten Egg Fart "After Bell shot the bear, the two hunters waited until they thought the bear had died... "They had tracked the bear into an area of thick cover when Mr. Stevenson was attacked by the wounded grizzly bear. His hunting partner was able to sh...
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Raw Chicken Revenge
(Preview)
New York Daily News | Submitted by: scarred 4 life "A bitter Colorado divorce case ended with the ex-husband stuffing raw chicken into the air vents of his now ex-wife's house, pouring bleach into her grand piano and targeting other objects of sentimental value. He also donned a pair of cleated...
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Piss Off, Ye Hooligans!
(Preview)
WHPTV | Submitted by: Diddly DS "So that's why, at his wits end, the 91-year-old dumped a bucket with urine in it on his porch and down to the sidewalk. "Someone on the street out of all the people hollered that's a piss bucket! Then that word got spread around to all the people out there,&quo...
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Shit Strongly And You Will Not Fear Death
(Preview)
Daily Mail | Submitted by: P Ray "He was on a military exercise in Brisbane with the Australian Defence Force, and it is believed a fuel spill may have caused the portable toilet he was using to blow up... His family in Connah's Quay, Flintshire, have paid a moving tribute to their "kind and...
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Death Row Pig Out Psych!
(Preview)
Reuters/CBS | Submitted by: Moose Dick "Brewer requested an elaborate meal that included a triple-meat bacon cheeseburger, a meat-lover's pizza, a big bowl of okra with ketchup, a pound of barbecue, a half a loaf of bread, peanut butter fudge, a pint of ice cream and two chicken-fried steaks....
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Body Displaced, BFD
(Preview)
WLKY | Submitted by: cyran0 "Angela Dehart, 23, slipped behind the wheel of the hearse when a funeral home worker left it with the door open and engine running as he got out to unlock a door. She then drove it home... Cops retrieved the vehicle -- and the body -- a few hours later." Read article...
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Time Capsule Cracked: Fingers!
(Preview)
Wire Services | Submitted by: JJ "The boy, aged seven, made the gruesome discovery on Monday when he was playing behind the gymnasium of his school in Chilly-Mazarin, just south of Paris, and noticed a jar poking out of the earth... He dug out the alcohol-filled jar and found three partially dec...
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Sleep Well
(Preview)
xxx | Submitted by: blah Read article...
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Sacrifice Appeases Tourism Gods
(Preview)
Maui Now | Submitted by: anonymous "A zipline tower collapse in Puakaa on Hawaii Island claimed the life of a Maui man, and left another man hospitalized with critical injuries... The Maui man fell 200 feet to his death in the incident. According to police reports, he was in the process of testi...
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Magpie Gets The Eye
(Preview)
The Chronicle AU | Submitted by: AKStubby "They had spent the afternoon in the park with Mr McInnes' girlfriend and her son without any hint of magpie trouble... "He was riding his bike back towards me and I saw it a magpie coming down really fast. His screams didn't shoo it away, it was only...
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Best Buds Take Final Spin
(Preview)
Denver Post | Submitted by: K9terror2 "After a shorter but boozier and less-amusing real-life version of the film Weekend at Bernie's, Denver prosecutors have charged two men with abusing a corpse, identity theft and criminal impersonation... Court papers say they loaded Jarrett's body i...
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But Did He Satisfy Them?
(Preview)
Daily Mail | Submitted by: Bella "Yesterday evening there was a queue outside my door," said Mr Berlusconi. "There were 11. I had eight because I couldnt go any further. You cant do all of them." Mr Berlusconi, 74, made the claim in a bugged phone chat with businessman Giampaol...
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Nic Cage's Late Night Guest
(Preview)
Wire Services | Submitted by: spooz "It was two in the morning. I was living in Orange County at the time and was asleep with my wife. My two-year old at the time was in another room. I opened my eyes and there was a naked man wearing my leather jacket eating a Fudgesicle in front of my bed." A Fudg...
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Game Over, Sonic
(Preview)
Spalding Today | Submitted by: athenstexman poop! "The officer looked at the ground where Ford had been squatting and saw "fresh human faeces on top of a dead hedgehog"... His solicitor, mitigating, attested; "He doesnt have any recollection of events on that day due to the a...
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Lumpface Chopper Killer
(Preview)
Daily Mail | Submitted by: P Ray "Caius Veiovis, 31, has undergone extensive implants to create horny lumps on his head and had a runic-looking 666 tattooed on his forehead et cetera... He is alleged to have been part of a gang which kidnapped, killed and buried three Hells Angels in Massachuse...
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Internal Unagi
(Preview)
Metro | Submitted by: Oh Lewis! "I climbed into the bath and I could feel the eels nibbling my body. But then suddenly I felt a severe pain and realised a small eel had gone into the end of my penis... I tried to hold it and take it out, but the eel was too slippery to be held and it disappeared up my penis...
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Sleeping In A Rubber Mask
(Preview)
Philadelphia Inquirer | Submitted by: Erick "Stelzenmuller, 49, lay dead in a corner of the attic near a cutup scuba suit and a mask with two tubes protruding from it... His obituary described him as the head of Penn Avionics, a firm that repairs electronics on private planes; it listed the domi...
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Sodden Corpse Gets Towed
(Preview)
Philadelphia Inquirer | Submitted by: Erick "The car was found in a flat, low-lying area with churches on two corners and train tracks running nearby. Awbury Arboretum is about four blocks north. A wall of water about 5 feet high cascaded through low-lying parts of East Germantown early Wedne...
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Dwarf Lured Into Badger Den
(Preview)
Radar Online | Submitted by: athenstexman badger! "Gordon Ramsey's dwarf porn doppelganger Percy Foster, star of X-rated movie Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, It's Up Your Arse We Go, was about to be rocketed into the ranks of celebrity porn lookalikes due to his resemblance to the Hell's Kitchen host when his p...
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