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TOPIC: They Come In 1's - Wacky News From Around The Globe


Barely a pulse...

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RE: They Come In 1's - Wacky News From Around The Globe
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Uke wrote:

Yeah but these hyper-lynx don't work. And *** is a good guy around this town!

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/02/us/oregon-shooting-umpqua-community-college.html?_r=0


 Links copy issue eh . Duz it work now ? Deja vu all over again.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/02/us/oregon-shooting-umpqua-community-college.html?_r=0

 



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Uke


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This belongs right here!

 

Runner, 58, Dies After Experiencing 'Chest Pains' During Krispy Kreme Challenge Doughnut Race

 

 

Runner Dies During Krispy Kreme Challenge Race in North Carolina
Racers undertake the "Krispy Kreme Challenge," whose motto is "2400 calories, 12 doughnuts, 5 miles, 1 hour"

 

A 58-year-old runner who was participating in the Krispy Kreme Challenge a North Carolina charity race in which competitors consume a dozen donuts while running 5 miles has died after experiencing chest pains, race organizers said.

"Unfortunately we have some sad news to share," the Krispy Kreme Challenge organizers in Raleigh wrote on Twitter. "We regretfully confirm that a participant of today's Krispy Kreme Challenge has died."

The race participant "stepped out of the race within the first mile and reported having chest pains."

He was transported by EMS to nearby Rex Hospital, where he was pronounced dead.



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Force Majeure

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How to spend a couple thousand bucks to support a stupid charity race and cost yourself a jillion in bad publicity from reinforced stereotypes.

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Freddie Kruegerwrote 
2h ago
My prediction which I stole from someone else.... Harris 52.7 percent of the vote and takes all the swing states...... You read it here.....


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Snippy wrote:

What a weird head.


 avatar?id=1593651&m=76&t=1453608913



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Uke


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Road trip! Let's go gramma!

 

Oregon Man Kidnaps Grandma at Knife Point, Goes on 12-Hour Road Trip

 
 

A 22-year-old Oregon man kidnapped his 87-year-old grandmother at knife point and forced her to drive for nearly 12 hours, the Marion County Sheriff's Office said Sunday.

Robert White of Salem was charged Sunday with unlawful possession of methamphetamine, kidnapping, menacing, criminal mischief and violating a protective order in the incident Saturday night, the sheriff's office said in a statement.

IMAGE: Robert White
Robert White, 22, was charged with kidnapping his 87-year-old grandmother. Marion County Sheriff's Office

The statement said that White's family had been "struggling to help" with his meth use and that his grandmother, who wasn't identified, had briefly placed her grandson in a hotel.

On Saturday night, the statement says, "she had to inform him that the money had run out and he needed to leave the hotel."

When his grandmother picked him up, White climbed into the backseat of her car, then "placed a knife to [her] throat and told her to drive," the statement says. "Driving through the night while her grandson smoked methamphetamine and rambled about the police following him for the past nine months, relief finally came when Mr. White called 911 at about 8 a.m."

The statement doesn't say what White told the dispatcher, but using GPS, the sheriff's office tracked his grandmother's vehicle to a road east of downtown Salem. White was taken into custody without incident, the statement notes, and his grandmother, "although tired ... was not harmed during the near 12 hour ordeal."



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Barely a pulse...

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Sadly, the Dr. that could really help this guy has passed away.

Dr. jack Kevorkian was his name, I think.

 

 



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Uke wrote:

Road trip! Let's go gramma!

Oregon Man Kidnaps Grandma at Knife Point, Goes on 12-Hour Road Trip

A 22-year-old Oregon man kidnapped his 87-year-old grandmother at knife point and forced her to drive for nearly 12 hours, the Marion County Sheriff's Office said Sunday.

Robert White of Salem was charged Sunday with unlawful possession of methamphetamine, kidnapping, menacing, criminal mischief and violating a protective order in the incident Saturday night, the sheriff's office said in a statement.

avatar?id=1597653&m=75&t=1457765269
The statement said that White's family had been "struggling to help" with his meth use and that his grandmother, who wasn't identified, had briefly placed her grandson in a hotel.Robert White, 22, was charged with kidnapping his 87-year-old grandmother.
Marion County Sheriff's Office

On Saturday night, the statement says, "she had to inform him that the money had run out and he needed to leave the hotel."

When his grandmother picked him up, White climbed into the backseat of her car, then "placed a knife to [her] throat and told her to drive," the statement says. "Driving through the night while her grandson smoked methamphetamine and rambled about the police following him for the past nine months, relief finally came when Mr. White called 911 at about 8 a.m."

The statement doesn't say what White told the dispatcher, but using GPS, the sheriff's office tracked his grandmother's vehicle to a road east of downtown Salem. White was taken into custody without incident, the statement notes, and his grandmother, "although tired ... was not harmed during the near 12 hour ordeal."




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Uke


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No names named. Including the tiger.

Florida zookeeper dies after being attacked by tiger

Emergency medical personnel transport a woman who was attacked by a tiger at the Palm Beach Zoo on Friday, April 15, 2016 in West Palm Beach, Florida.

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. -- A zoo employee died Friday after being attacked by a tiger at the Palm Beach Zoo, CBS affiliate WPEC reported.

West Palm Beach Police said it happened inside a contained area just before 1:45 p.m. Animal control officers and the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission also responded.

Police said the tiger was tranquilized. Authorities had to wait until the drugs took effect on the tiger before rescue crews could get to the female victim.

A zoo employee called the situation a "staff emergency." Guests were sent to the gift shop for safety, and safety protocols were initiated, according to the zoo.

The zoo was evacuated and will remain closed for the next two days, according to spokeswoman Naki Carter.

Carter told WPEC the tiger did not escape its enclosure. The incident took place in the night house where the tigers sleep as the zookeeper was preparing for a "tiger talk" with zoo guests.

Carter added that no one inside the zoo was in danger.

The male tiger invovled in the attack was one of four tigers at the zoo. It was later put down.



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Police: Man stinks up downtown Athens bar with fart spray

http://onlineathens.com/mobile/2016-04-14/police-man-stinks-downtown-athens-bar-fart-spray

 



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Force Majeure

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disbelief

When police searched the Oconee County resident, they found in his pants pocket a spray bottle of Liquid ASS, which appeared to have worked as advertised.



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Freddie Kruegerwrote 
2h ago
My prediction which I stole from someone else.... Harris 52.7 percent of the vote and takes all the swing states...... You read it here.....


Barely a pulse...

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no

Awkward Moment Seal - Sorry WHAT? IM TOO LAZY TO FART OR HEAR



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Uke


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Well maybe not. Some are combo things, like "I'll shoot you, then myself!" Double suicide. Sort of... But if a person is determined to do themselves in, do it alone. Don't jump. or do it by train. Railroaders don't need extra trauma. Working for the likes of BIG railroad is bad enough! And you white women, just quit it right now! Life is good. Give it a chance!

http://www.chron.com/news/medical/article/Report-Third-of-suicides-in-US-are-among-7293644.php



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Force Majeure

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Gives new meaning to "White Flight".

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Going Back to 1850 and 1933 all at once!

 

Freddie Kruegerwrote 
2h ago
My prediction which I stole from someone else.... Harris 52.7 percent of the vote and takes all the swing states...... You read it here.....


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*** needs to save more of them. We already know that Snippy is ready to volunteer his rehabilitation services, at least some of the time.

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Uke


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*** would like to help, but middle aged, white women, neurotic white women at that, can really be a pain in the ass!



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